Saturday, May 29, 2010

I am who I am

I am Smashley...
I am 20 years old...
I am a female...
I am in College...

I have grown up in suburbia and never thought much about it. I have taken many of the opportunities given to me for granted and am learning how to appreciate life and all that has been given too me. My parents have handed me the world on a silver platter, making sacrifices to allow me to do the things I loved the most. They are paying for my schooling, paying for my living accommodations, and giving me money to do all the extras.

Through the years I have developed relationships with many people some positive most negative influences on my life. As I learn how to sort out the positive from the negative I am constantly evaluating where I am now and where I could have been if I had followed the path my parents had laid out for me. The negative aspects and influences have taken a toll on the relationship me and my parents used to share.

The one girl who has always been with me since we were three years old is the one person i could not imagine my life without. We have had rough patches but through growing up our friendship has built into a sisterhood. As an only child I always wanted a sister and in the past two years that is exactly what I have gained. She is the first person I call when I am sad, knowing that as soon as she says hello I instantly feel better. This girl is always there whether its a 4:00 am phone call in tears or helping me get ready for my big day when I find that perfect guy.

Moving away to college has been one of the best experiences of my life I have created bonds with people that will never be destroyed. I have gotten to know members of my family alot better and have developed a tie with my cousin that most don't understand. He has become by best friend, my confidant and a shoulder I can cry on without judgment. I am a lot closer with my third cousins then most people are with the first but together we are a team that face all the challenges of any group friends.

One person in particular that has made college that much better is Cassie...I mentioned her in my last post as well as in my other blog. It has taken us two years to build the friendship we have but we are slowly starting to open up more and more about each other. I like the friendship we have because she is not like most of the people I have met here. She is not afraid to admit who she is, she is strong and caring, she knows how to have fun with out the influence of alcohol...we get together to study and procrastinate by playing Xbox. She is one of the main people I know I will always keep in touch with.

Aleshia is another girl I couldn't see my life without...Together we are the A Team travel to local parties and dominate at flip cup and beer pong (at least in our minds :P) We love to party together and always have a blast. We can turn a boring night into an adventure in 5 minutes.

Now for the buys in my life...

Ben...I don't even know how to describe our relationship...maybe at one time there was something but for now we are just friends. I met him the first year I moved here, he was my cousins best friend and we hit it off right away...slowly something grew and I fell hard but he hasn't grown up enough to handle a relationship and I have to give him that time. the more time and space I put between us the more my feelings fade away and soon his chance will be over.

Then, there is Mike...I only met him a few weeks ago but we instantly clicked...we have all the same hobbies and interests, and even took the same program in college...the difference is I want a relationship, and just got out of one. He assured me he wanted to be friends but I haven't heard anything from him in like a week so it leaves me to believe that he is as fake as Pamela Andersen's Tits.

So that's me in a nut shell...follow me and my adventures of graduating school entering the workforce and looking for love around every corner :)

xo Smashley

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