The Sky is falling...no but the ground is moving!!!

Okay so as i sat procrastinating walking my dog in my room there was a loud rumble followed by subtle shaking followed by my father yelling "WHAT THE F*CK DID YOU DO!?" and once realizing i had not moved from my bed he ran outside...it has been concluded that an Earthquake has shaken up Ottawa and the surrounding area. Creeeping the profile of my many FB friends I have concluded that the Earthquake has his the GTA, Durham Region, Kawartha Lakes, and parts of the US and Ontario Order as well as Montreal...i ask myself how does this happen in Ontario the one place that there are never earthquake drills in school...weird

til the next crazy phenomena
xo Smashley

Another Sleepless Night...

As I sit in the middle of no where with no friends, no cell phone, and according to my mother no TV..I have to wonder where it came to the point where it is okay to invite friends over, kick me out of the bedroom i have become a custom to over the past two weeks, and then continue to yell and scream outside of where your daughter is trying to sleep at one in the morning even after she has privately told you that the reason she came back to the festivities was because it was to loud to sleep. But that's my mother for for you...

Maybe I am just resentful because her and my father seem to not care if i have friends and have created rules that stop me from even attempting to make any because according to them I shouldn't associate myself with the young demographic of this town...but if it is that bad then why move here, why force me to live here when i have a perfectly good, and empty apartment sitting in Peterborough where my cousins are, and the people i have spent that last two years building relationships are.

I asked her if I could watch TV while I waited for them to finish there late night antics and her response was to turn up the music playing through the satellite. IT'S NOT FAIR! and I know what your thinking well life's not fair but you would think a mother might have a little more respect for her daughter.

As for my beach plans they were quickly canceled when my mother wouldn't let me walk on the beach alone at night...We live in a town with 2000 people how bad could it be I grew up in Oshawa aka THE DIRTY SHWA! Where i was permitted to wonder around Radio Park (the hangout for drop outs burn outs and everyone in between) and Stay out until all hours when I was 16 but all of a sudden now that I am 20 and live somewhere that very little can happen I have rules and Restrictions...and of course when I argue this her response is well then find a job and somewhere else to live if you don't like my rules...NEWS FLASH...I have somewhere else to live but you forced me to come back here...I would happily go back to the Peter Patch and be with the people who have come to be closer to me then my own parents.

I can't believe that it has only been two weeks and already I am slipping back into the clinical depression state I was in before I left for school... but hey history is supposed to repeat itself right...

This is the story of my Life!...FML

Thanks for reading my rants...and hopefully i will have something more uplifting to write next time I post...and if those of you are saying why the hell am I reading this she is just a spoiled young adult well then have your opinions and I am sorry fro wasting your time

C-Bay...

I know I haven't updated in a long time and I feel guilty but there hasn't been much going on...I have moved back in with my parents only they no longer live in the beautiful town of Whitby where I grew up...They now live in Constance Bay or C-Bay as it seems to be called. It has been two weeks since I have had more then a phone conversation with someone my age but i am hoping this will all change.

Tomorrow I will embark on my first adventure here in the boondocks...I am going to find something to do on a friday night in a small town...I am going to go to the beach and I am going to talk to people...or at least a person if it kills me.

In the mean time my life pretty much consists of working out (home gym), Chores (anything my parents do not want to do over the next year), and walking for miles to find the library (a 20 X 10 room with very few books)...Hopefully my last summer before I graduate and enter the real world becomes more exciting

Until tomorrow Goodnight Bloggers and if anyone from Constance Bay reads this SAVE ME FROM MY BOREDOM!

Xo Smashley

Unexpected Visitors...

After spending hours at the hospital last night the last thing I wanted when I got home was company. All i wanted was to curl up in bed watch a movie and pass out. I live in a basement apartment with my own entrance, however can hear every little footstep my landlords and there family take, so it didn't surprise me when I heard a couple of subtle taps and bangs and so I just rolled over and tried to close my eyes. When I heard my door opening I screamed...The only person that would be coming in would be my cousin if he was in town and went to the bar and needed somewhere to crash, but he was away helping his dads friend at the cottage. As I walked out of my bedroom all I see is BEN...goofy look on his face not realizing he had nearly given me a heart attack.

For Ben everything is physical...for me on the other hand I have fallen and am having trouble picking up the pieces. it hurts me when he does this appearing act followed directly by a disappearing act. Last night I finally took a stand. I told him that he can't come over and just expect to fool around and leave...I told him that he can't just over expecting shit because it hurt me to see him leave time after time. He tried to make me believe that he would change but I know him awe to well he'll come back another day unexpected and I'll let him...Let's just hope he grows up asap and we can work out our differences...

Xo Smashley

My long time hate of hospitals and new found hate for a certian bunny rabit...

So last week Cass and her BF took me on an adventure...we went to a place called The Old Hope Sawmill in hopes of catching some sort of fish other then rock bass or sun fish...I have never been one to fish...in fact I was always the girl who would go out out with the guys to sit in the boat and star gaze...i might cast once or twice and heaven forbid if I ever caught something I'd scream and say, "GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF" so instead of fishing I decided to take pictures...

Cass and I decided to let her BF fish in peace and go for a walk...during this point of the adventure I was Camera happy...When I saw what I thought was a cute little bunny I decided to take a picture...however this cute little bunny seemed to be camera shy and kept running away...as I followed the rabbit Cass warned me that there maybe poison ivy so i quickly found my way back to the trail failing to capture the image. I now look at my red, swollen and itchy legs and have determined that the cuteness of the bunny was just a disguise of it's evilness creating a new found hate for a certain bunny.

So as my poison ivy became itchier, it also began to look tres infected...and there begins my next adventure to Peterborough General Hospital Emergency department...Now i have always hated hospitals...maybe it is because they remind me of the passing of family members, or because I hate injuries, blood and all that goes with them, but i truly believe it is the how the doctors think your dumb for coming in for the small things. But for all i knew my leg need to be amputated...or at least needed to be cleaned and wrapped to get rid of infection.

After waiting 3 long hours to see a doctor...he took one look and says..."Oh no, you have poison ivy...we are going to have to cut it off." it didn't help that he said it sarcastically...now i have 2 weeks of playing cream to my legs and hopefully i will again be able to wear shorts and get some sun...of course this happens the one year that we have sun before September!

I still am still blaming the STUPID BUNNY! and the only thought that goes through my head is "Silly Rabbit tricks are for kids" I will one day travel back to the land where that evil rodent hops and seek my revenge...but next time I will be prepared...Hip waders, a large thick rain coat, and gloves...I will get the picture of that bunny if it kills me...

I am posting this with one last thought to the Bunny...REVENGE IS A BITCH SO BE PREPARED!

until my next adventure...
xo Smashley

I am who I am

I am Smashley...
I am 20 years old...
I am a female...
I am in College...

I have grown up in suburbia and never thought much about it. I have taken many of the opportunities given to me for granted and am learning how to appreciate life and all that has been given too me. My parents have handed me the world on a silver platter, making sacrifices to allow me to do the things I loved the most. They are paying for my schooling, paying for my living accommodations, and giving me money to do all the extras.

Through the years I have developed relationships with many people some positive most negative influences on my life. As I learn how to sort out the positive from the negative I am constantly evaluating where I am now and where I could have been if I had followed the path my parents had laid out for me. The negative aspects and influences have taken a toll on the relationship me and my parents used to share.

The one girl who has always been with me since we were three years old is the one person i could not imagine my life without. We have had rough patches but through growing up our friendship has built into a sisterhood. As an only child I always wanted a sister and in the past two years that is exactly what I have gained. She is the first person I call when I am sad, knowing that as soon as she says hello I instantly feel better. This girl is always there whether its a 4:00 am phone call in tears or helping me get ready for my big day when I find that perfect guy.

Moving away to college has been one of the best experiences of my life I have created bonds with people that will never be destroyed. I have gotten to know members of my family alot better and have developed a tie with my cousin that most don't understand. He has become by best friend, my confidant and a shoulder I can cry on without judgment. I am a lot closer with my third cousins then most people are with the first but together we are a team that face all the challenges of any group friends.

One person in particular that has made college that much better is Cassie...I mentioned her in my last post as well as in my other blog. It has taken us two years to build the friendship we have but we are slowly starting to open up more and more about each other. I like the friendship we have because she is not like most of the people I have met here. She is not afraid to admit who she is, she is strong and caring, she knows how to have fun with out the influence of alcohol...we get together to study and procrastinate by playing Xbox. She is one of the main people I know I will always keep in touch with.

Aleshia is another girl I couldn't see my life without...Together we are the A Team travel to local parties and dominate at flip cup and beer pong (at least in our minds :P) We love to party together and always have a blast. We can turn a boring night into an adventure in 5 minutes.

Now for the buys in my life...

Ben...I don't even know how to describe our relationship...maybe at one time there was something but for now we are just friends. I met him the first year I moved here, he was my cousins best friend and we hit it off right away...slowly something grew and I fell hard but he hasn't grown up enough to handle a relationship and I have to give him that time. the more time and space I put between us the more my feelings fade away and soon his chance will be over.

Then, there is Mike...I only met him a few weeks ago but we instantly clicked...we have all the same hobbies and interests, and even took the same program in college...the difference is I want a relationship, and just got out of one. He assured me he wanted to be friends but I haven't heard anything from him in like a week so it leaves me to believe that he is as fake as Pamela Andersen's Tits.

So that's me in a nut shell...follow me and my adventures of graduating school entering the workforce and looking for love around every corner :)

xo Smashley

biggest Parts of My Day with One of The biggest People

My friend Cassie and I spend hours playing X-Box it's just our thing...We use her Boyfriends Live account and play Nazi Zombies...in our adventures of saving the world from the dead we meet people who share our passion. Lately we have been playing with the two same people Matt and Jeremy. These two live in different countries but seem to have a friendship as if they lived next door. Matt lives in Ontario and Jeremy in Indiana...Although Cass and I are from Ontario we live almost 6 hours away from Matt. So we can be our selves in conversations and no one cares who you really are and dosn't really care.

Cassie and I decided to take a short and deserved smoke break, when I came inside you could hear there conversations through the speakers...They were talking about how they like us and how we have sweet personalities and shit...it was cute I then said I was back and One of Jeremy kept talking which made me and Matt Laugh when he realized I was back he got all embarrassed and shit It was very CUTE <3

Together we travel the world of Nacht Der Untoten and fight the evil that has taken over...Our friendship is like any other friendship, we watch each others back, help one another is in trouble and laugh about all the funny things in conversation.

Jeremy asked for my number and sent me a picture...he isnt what I expected But hott all the same <3 lol

Stay Tuned for more about my life...ill post some background info about me later but time was of the essence when writing this since I was hanging out with them in our virtual world

xo Smashley